Hiking Is My Retirement Plan — Funny Hiking T-Shirt

No 401(k). No portfolio. No financial advisor returning your calls. Just a pair of worn-in boots and a vague plan to keep walking uphill until something gives out.
This is the shirt for people whose retirement strategy is "die on a trail somewhere nice." It won't fix your finances. It will, however, hold up wash after wash, mile after mile, while you ignore the spreadsheet.
Printed on a tee — soft, true to size, and built to survive more abuse than your savings account. Made to order, because we don't print things nobody's going to wear.

Hiking is my retirement plan. It's not a good plan. It's just the one I've got.

• 100% cotton
• Sport Grey is 90% cotton, 10% polyester
• Ash Grey is 99% cotton, 1% polyester
• Heather colors are 50% cotton, 50% polyester
• Fabric weight: 5.0–5.3 oz/yd² (170-180 g/m²)
• Open-end yarn
• Tubular fabric
• Taped neck and shoulders
• Double seam at sleeves and bottom hem
• Blank product sourced from Honduras, Nicaragua, Haiti, Dominican Republic, Bangladesh, Mexico

Disclaimers: 
• Due to the fabric properties, the White color variant may appear off-white rather than bright white.
• Dark color speckles throughout the fabric are expected for the color Natural.

This product is made especially for you as soon as you place an order, which is why it takes us a bit longer to deliver it to you. Making products on demand instead of in bulk helps reduce overproduction, so thank you for making thoughtful purchasing decisions!

Size guide